Tears for Last Order
by darkwriter14
Summary: Last Order had said that someone would shed tears for her individual death.  She was right.  T just to be safe for language.  One-shot.


Hey there, everyone! Darkwriter14 here! Man, it's been a while since I last wrote on here! I started an 'Inception' fanfic FOREVER ago, but I could never seem to get it off the ground... I guess that's what I get for trying to just wing it. I always just NEED a plotline, or the story never works. So why did I try? Don't ask me. I'm just a moron. I'll probably try getting back to it eventually when I work out an actual plot... But that's not important here, is it? :/ What IS important is that I absolutely love love LOVE Accelerator and Last Order, and I was disappointed that there were barely any stories on them. So without further ado, ignore my ranting about my writing life...which isn't important... Please enjoy! ^^

~I do not own and will never own the fabulous anime Toaru Majutsu no Index~

The first thing that he felt was disbelief. Disbelief, followed quickly by a sickening dread that sent his stomach plummeting deep into his body. Despite the incredibly strong powers flowing through his body, accessible with just the flick of a switch, his body was weak, dead weight. His feet were like blocks of lead as he stumbled forward, his eyes trained on the small body lying only feet away from him. His mind was spinning wildly with countless thoughts, but only a few could make a fleshed-out sound in his mind.

_Please... God, Lady Luck, Mother Nature, whoever the hell is out there...don't do this to her..._

Accelerator, standing beside her at last, could find nothing to say or do. Around him were the walls of abandoned warehouses, properly graffitied for the bad side of Academy City, with the faint odor of tobacco. Somewhere beyond the alley where he stood, the nearly inaudible sounds of deep bass music and yelling could be heard. And above him, the distinct rumble of thunder. He was completely alone, and there was nowhere he could go and nothing he could do.

A wild fury consumed Accelerator's body like wildfire, devouring all logic and reason. _No...dammit, what kind of pansy am I?__ I'm the Level 5! I'm the strongest in Academy City! Who the freaking hell says I can't do a damn thing?_

He knelt down beside her, ignoring the blood that began to seep into the knees of his gray jeans, and nudged her head to the side to feel for a pulse. A strange feeling filled his stomach as her head moved limply, like a lifeless doll. The feeling only deepened when he found no pulse.

No! There was something he could do! There had to be! He was the freaking Level 5! He placed his hand on her forehead, his mind spinning feverishly as he scrambled for a solution-a scientific way to push the blood into flowing circulation again with his redirection, or _something_ with vector change!

But as he searched urgently for an answer, he voice in the back of his mind whispered to him just how hopeless it was. Nothing, not even a Level 5 esper, could change death.

Accelerator's hand slowly went limp and slid away from the tiny girl's forehead.

_"Is it really so scary to reciprocate her kindness?"_

Accelerator suddenly heard Yomikawa's past words echoing in his mind, springing up from where he had shoved them a long time ago. He had thought he didn't deserve to be kind and live like a good person, not after the experiment. Not after all the Misaka clones he had murdered. Sure, he had been hesitant to join the experiment, but what did that mean? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. He regretted it, yet he did nothing. With a past like that, how dare he even _hope_ for a new start. He was a murdered, a monster, and he deserved to remain like that and go on to hell where he belonged. He knew that. Yomikawa _should _know it. Last Order _definitely_ should have known that. And yet, she kept coming back to him and staying by his side.

_You damn brat..._ Accelerator grit his teeth in anger. His eyes felt like they were burning as rain began to drip into them. _What kind of idiotic brat were you? It's your own fault-always being so careless and stupid, no matter how many times I told you 'no'. _Accelerator's eyes stung, and his throat was unusually tight. _Dammit...dammitt...DAMMIT... It's YOUR fault, you damn brat! You got what was coming to you!_ He immediately regretted these thoughts, and he slammed his right palm to his head, digging his nails into the skin as he clenched his eyes shut tight, shutting out the world.

Where could he go? His-_their_-temporary home was on the completely opposite side of town. Even if it was close by, he doubted he would go there anyway. He couldn't. She was _always_ there with him. Every time he turned around a corner, he would be seeing her, doing her stupid antic of the day and just _begging_ for a chase. At the realization that this would never happen again, an agonizing pain-sharper even than the bullet that had pierced his skull-filled his chest.

He'd always wanted to be alone. That was what he deserved. And, for a while, it wasn't so bad. He didn't have to worry about others, saying the wrong things, worrying about-Heaven forbid-_feelings_. But then Last Order came around, and he found someone that needed him, absolutely _needed_ him and somehow wanted him. Never before had he felt such..._normal, _human feelings. And after feeling them, he found that it was a lot harder to give up.

It was a lot harder now, as he realized just how little he had expressed towards Last Order. Gratitude, shame, friendship... So many things he should have tried harder to do. If not for himself, he should have tried harder for her. But now there was no more second chances for that.

"_If I die, someone will shed tears for me,"_ he suddenly recalled the young girl saying. Accelerator felt blood from where he was digging his nails into his forehead, but he didn't care. That was better than feeling the humiliating, disgusting tears that he didn't deserve to shed sliding down his cheeks.

If anything, he would shed the tears for her, just like she had said.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~End~~~~~~~

Please, please, please review! ^^


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